Louisiana Purchase

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  • You know, mon chien? I really want to develop that newfangled colony in the Americas. I think it'll really put a good image to my name for the good citizens of France.
  • In France, Napoleon Bonaparte was cooking up some plans for WORLD DOMINATION!
  • That little French man did what?! IMPEDING OUR SHIPPING IN NEW ORLEANS!!
  • Bonaparte secretly took over some Spanish land east of the Mississippi, but Jefferson found out.
  • Quick! Somebody buy all the French land east of the Mississippi from Bonaparte! He'll be so busy using the money to wage war in Europe, he definitely won't just attack us!!
  • Impeccable logic, sir.
  • For various reasons, Napoleon agreed to the sale of the "Louisiana Territory".
  • Mon chien, our armies in America are dying, and I NEED MONEY FOR QUICHE!! I guess we'll have to sell that land to that really nice "Jefferson" guy.
  • It'll be winter soon. Hannibal says Russia's really nice this time of year. I'll invade there next!!
  • Meanwhile, Jefferson was pondering the constitutionality of his recent "Louisiana Purchase". Jefferson was a Republican, and believed in a strict interpretation of the powers of federal government. By buying this land on behalf of the United States, he was making use of powers not explicitly stated in the Constitution.
  • All this power... I can expand the Republican hold on the United States... I can get all the quiche a man could possibly want... But is it right...? It must be, for the good of the nation.
  • Namely, Meriwether Lewis, and William Clark, guided by Sacajawea.
  • Hey guys, let's find a passage...
  • Yeah, somewhere in the Northwest...
  • Because the US nearly doubled in size, SOMEBODY had to go look at it...
  • SECEDE!
  • Because all of the Louisiana Territory would be owned by agrarian farmers, Republican powers in the government mor than doubled...
  • AND GREATER POWER IN THE GOVERNMENT!
  • This caused many Federalists to become fearful, some even wanting to secede from the Union...
  • WE WANT OUR QUICHE!
  • DOWN WITH JEFFERSON!
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