The Catcher in the Rye story board
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Holden and his self loathing in "The Catcher in The Rye"
Anyway I meet with and see many people while traveling through New York but it always ends with me hating myself more and more. Besides old Phoebe. I love old Phoebe. She is the only person that I think that makes me happy. I try to do good things, because you know, people say doing the right thing makes you feel good and stuff inside and I try to act like these phony's put here and get with some ladies but I always end up hating myself in the end. I just want to go off on my own and do my own thing without being with phony people that make my stomach turn. I wouldn't say I deserve to be here but it is better then being with all these people who don't care about anything. Well, I'm not going to say I am glad to have met you or good luck but if that'll make you feel better then oh well, because we don't mean it, we just say it.
Hello, I am Holden Caulfield. I would say nice to meet you but it isn't so nice nor do I really care. The story, "The Catcher in The Rye" is me explaining for the 100th time my last few days before getting stuck in this place and why everyone is so phony. All the phony encounters make me just want to die. And being kicked out of Pence isn't all that bad since they are full of them. I don't really like myself and there isn't much cool about me. I'm nothing like J.B, Allie or Phoebe. I'm not even sure how we ended up related but I guess that's the way life goes. People may not believe it but I have feelings, I really I do. But people always go for the phony's, like dear old Jane.
"After they left, I started getting sorry that I'd only given them ten bucks for their collection....I was sorry anyway, though. Goddamn money. It always ends up making you blue as hell."
When they got up to go, the two nuns, I did something very stupid and embarrassing.
"I didn't want a bunvh of stupid rubbernecks looking at me when I was all gory."
"Maurice was roughing Holden up to make him pay Sunny the extra fee. Holden called Maurice dirty Moron, so Maurice hit him in the stomach"
Self loathing is self hatred, refers an extreme dislike or hatred of one self or being angry at or even prejudiced against oneself.
Holden believes Catholics enjoy conversation more when the others are catholic as well and that creates social barriers. He never says it but he feels really awkward when talking to people and he feels giving the money made them like talking to him. He feels like because e is on the more "wealthier" side he can offer money to people so they like him. He hates himself because he isn't able to talk to people normally like others.
Holden shows self loathing in this scene because he let's what others do to him get to him. He allowed what Sunny and Maurice did effect him. Holden's help for himself starts when someone begins to make him feel bad. He never says he is upset but that is how the hate for himself comes.
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