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  • What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already told her twice!
  • Why laugh at a joke you don't think is funny?
  • Dude, seriously? Why is that even funny? Would you ever hit your girlfriend?
  • Chill. It's just a joke!
  • It's never just a joke
  • When you make a joke, somewhere someone just lost respect for you. Somewhere a girl decides she trusts you a little less than she used to.
  • What is it?
  • Nothing. Just... I don't really want to hang out with those guys anymore.
  • How is a woman like a condom? Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick
  • What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They're both empty from the neck up!
  • What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets? Women!
  • Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
  • I like my violence like I like my beer: domestic!
  • A dying woman said "I want to feel like a woman" just before she died, so a nearby man agreed to help her out. He took off his shirt, handed it to her, and said: "Here, iron this"
  • STOP!!!
  • Why do women have legs? So they can get from the bedroom to the kitchen!
  • Every joke you make about a woman belonging in the kitchen banishes her there a little more permanently...
  • And, I promise you, the kitchen was not the "room of one's own" that Virginia Woolf was talking about.
  • Every time a girl overhears a joke like this she thinks, "maybe I'm not as smart"
  • Why do blondes wear their hair up? To catch everything that goes over their heads!
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