De-escalating Aggressive Behavior in Kindergarten by Elizabeth Hu

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  • Keep calm and keep distance
  • Aaaaargh! Aaaaargh! Aaaargh!  *punches the floor*
  • De-escalating Aggressive Student Behavior in Kindergarten
  • Breathe and stay calm...
  • Cate & Bill, please play on the other side of the room...
  • Okay, Ms. Allen...
  • Acknowledge student's emotions
  • I hate Cate and Bill!
  • Marty, I know you're feeling mad. You can share with me what happened... I'm listening...
  • Ask open-ended questions to understand cause of anger & find solutions
  • They're not fair, so I hate them!
  • I didn't win the game...
  • What happened? What did Cate and Bill do that made you angry?
  • What makes you say that they're not fair?
  • I need to actively listen and plan action
  • Give student choices on how to resolve conflict
  • I want to play with them again...
  • That's a good choice. Okay, let's stand up...
  • When you lose a game, it doesn't mean that others are unfair. In games, it's natural to have winners and losers...  you know that. If you win the game, would you want Cate & Bill to hate you, too? So here's a choice you can make - do you want to stay away and play on your own or do you want to go back there and have fun with them like you always do?
  • Communicate high behavior expectations but show value and acceptance
  • Okay, Ms. Allen.
  • I'll say sorry to Cate and Bill for getting mad at them.
  • I know you'll do well when you go back to Cate & Bill... what should you tell them first?
  • That'sright, Marty. I'm sure Cate and Bill will forgive you. Remember that anger will not solve your problem, it will only make you, as well as your friends, feel very bad. I believe you can control your emotions next time.
  • Give student time to reflect
  • I won't get angry 'coz it's just a game, and just have fun playing with my friends.
  • Thank you, Ms. Allen!
  • So what can you do the next time you lose a game?
  • Great! Now go and have fun with your friends.
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