Hercules and the Stymphalian Birds
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Hi! I'm one of the Stymphalian birds that Hercules quote on quote "killed." Well, he didn't really kill us! See everyone thinks that me and my brethren are psycho killers that kill and eat the bodies of elderlies and young children, but they are so wrong! But the red bird you can see over there, that is what a real psycho looks like.
Hercules and The Stymphalian Birds (The True Story)
As my sixth labor from the great King Eurystheus, I shall slay your entire population with my silver sword that is probably made from your Great Aunt Gretta!
So, we tried to avenge Gretta by stealing Hercules's sword. Instead Hercules started flailing his arms and screaming for his Daddy's help. He sprinted away yelling at the top of his lungs.
O great Stymphalian Birds, please spare my life! My father, Zeus, will bless you with eternal life! O great birds, please play dead for me while King Eurystheus checks to make sure I have killed you! I shall smear the delicacy called ketchup on the ground so it looks like blood!
That's a great deal! We agree.
I, King Eurystheus, declare the 6th labor of Hercules complete! These birds are deader than a doornail!
So, there you have it! The true story of Hercules and the Stymphalian Birds!
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