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Many years ago, there was a man living in Canaan. One day while he was down by the river, an army of skeletons approached him. They told him that they wished to take his beloved city to the underworld with him. The man, however, refused, and thus began the skeleton war.
"You can't take our city!" cried the man. "We have much to offer!" The skeletons suspiciously raised their swords. "Like our literature!" the man hurried. "We created much well-known and highly appreciated stories and poems, including the epic of Kret, a hero who rescued his true love from an evil king!"
"We did that with our own alphabet that this man created, one that I KNOW will be used for thousands of years to come!"
Our wonderful nation contains the best agriculture around! You can't get rid of us, we have methods to share that will ensure the harvest of the fruits that grow!
"And so what if we perform human sacrifices... It's to honor our beloved gods who aid us in our agriculture!"
We offer this gift of life to you, God El! May you give us peace and prosperity in return!
You see? My country has much to offer to society. You shouldn't take all of our gifts and talents away from the future world!
Aye, we see now. I guess we'll just have to wait for the Israelites to take over your land, and take it from them.
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