One Thousand Dollars
By mondmann, Updated
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Old Bryson, wake up. I've a funny story to tell you.
I wish you would tell it to some one in the billiard-room. You know how I hate your stories.
This is a better one than usual, and I'm going to tell it to you. It's too sad and funny to go with the rattling of billiard balls. I've just come form my late uncle's firm of legal corsairs. He leaves me an even thousand dollars. Now, what can a man possibly do with a thousand dollars?
I thought that the late Septimas Gillian was worth something like half a million.
He was, and that's where the joke comes in.
He's left his whole cargo of doubloons to a microbe. The butler and the housekeeper get a seal ring and $10 each. His nephew gets $1,000.
You've always had plenty of money to spend.
Tons. Uncle was the fairy godmother as far as an allowance was concerned.
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