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AD: "Wanna be like Mary Potatobowlandson and get captured by the Wampam Pumpkins to watch as they skin your close potato head friends? Well come on down to Metacomet Stadium for the full experience today..."
PPPSA (Public Potato and Pumpkin Service Announcement): Hi tots and squats, the game seems to have officially turned into a war, we are currently having a water break ^-^. Be the kid that steals the most land while the adults take care of each other!
"Ya know, like three years now, when you killed our coach and stole our land, and it's been pretty stu-stu since then."
"Wait guys, how long have been fighting?"
"Hey bro, let's just give it up, my back hash is falling out."
"Fine dude, but stay away from us."
"And so the Potatoes continued to grab Pam Pam land. Eventually, the Pam Pams became scarce and the Potatoes formed a mashed army. Now they all live semi-conjoined in Massapowampachusetts.
~Dedicated to the Wampanoag and the British~
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