Memoir

Memoir
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  •    The chilly air is still, by her longing, silent, cry. The hospital cold, cold room, filled with the stench of death, hanging, hanging in the air. He sat there, I sat there in that lonely deserted corner of the stone cold room, her body intertwined with mine, cold, cold as could be. They stood there a dark expression swimming its way across their faces, the three stood there, motionless, my father, my brother, and sis.
  •     It was a  chilly fifth of December, it’s winter air cold and  mocking with it’s wind standing motionless saying a silent pray to its world up above. I couldn't wait to see them: Ginger and Layla. They would be getting back from the vets soon. I was so delighted, I would hold their soft, sleek fur once again, But, once I got in the car I heard it, the tragedy.
  • "   The car was bitterly cold, as the story unraveled itself. I think it was better that it happened sooner rather than later, it stopped me from getting close to her, even though I was. My  mind was swirling it could be happening “n- no, no, No” the sobbing tears cried out. "She can't be ----". I couldn't choke out the words, the pit in my heart began to blacken, and rot. The pain i couldn't bare, its wait, betides nothing but everything, no my mind screamed. “He's not too...” I started, my mother comforted my, but it felt cold and bitterly painful.
  • N- no, no, No. She can't be ----. He's not too...
  •    I couldn't, wouldn't, let this be true, “she can't be dead”, the tears came in waves choking out my breath, blackening my heart, my nonexistent heart. “I'm so sorry” my mother spoke through my tears of regret, it was my fault, “it was my fault” I knew it I let them declaw her, I let her fall asleep, I let her die, she died on me. Then he comes, Ginger, he pushes his head with hers, then he grimes he dead body, he loved her too, it's not just my fault, no it is.
  • I'm so sorry
  • She can't be dead. She can't be dead
  •    The darkness of my heart engulfed my sole, leaving me nothing, nothing Ii tell you. The death, her sorrow it failed me, but i failed her. Ginger would soon find himself with four other cats, Saffron, Peppermint, Poppyseed, and Sage, none replacing layla. Her death was my fault, but I carrier her soul with mine, forever. This, this changed how i see, it pulled my heart till it broken, ever tear, ever soob, my emotions fossilized, its cold. I stopped me from getting close to people, even to myself, since two thousand and five.
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