My water broke
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by Amy Wells
Damn, baby! My water broke on my favorite Target doormat!
Sis, my water broke! Call 911 now, it's an emergency!
What happened? Are you okay? What's that on the floor...?
Hold on, they're on their way! Could you switch the laundry while you're down there?
No, I can't switch the laundry, I'm going into labor!
I'm only down here to get my purse, gosh-dangit!
This f*cking baby better come soon or I'm suing every last one of you imbeciles!
How the f*ck am I gonna pay all these hospital bills...
Aww, he's beautiful! Thank you!
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