Once upon a time, in a land called Rudis Pullum, lived a beautiful princess of the anaerobic bacteria who was named Salmonella. She lived with her three annoying younger brothers Diarrhea, Cramps, and Fever.
One day, a handsome but mysterious creature arrived to the kingdom and began taking samples of what seemed to be soil he had brought. Everyone including Salmonella became suspicious of as to why he was intruding their land?
Salmonella introduced herself to the creature and he responded by saying, “My name is Sir George, I am a human who is here to destroy your land because I AM HUNGRY!” Immediately Salmonella and her three brothers attacked the man in attempts to save their land. It was a long and hard battle that lasted between 12-72 hours, until Sir George decided to do the unthinkable.
Sir George took out his electrolyte gun and sprayed down the whole land of Rudis Pullum, and then took his precious antidiarrheal sword which had an engraving that read “loperamide” and slashed Diarrhea straight in the heart, killing him several hours later.
As days went by, and all of the land was in distress over the barbaric battle, Sir George sat with Salmonella, and apologized for his unfair treatment to her land. She explained that the land had been experiencing some irregular weather conditions, leaving the temperatures to sway between 4-60 degrees celsius.
Sir George and Salmonella made peace, and Sir George road off into the sunset look for his next foodborne illness infected land, in attempts to find something to eat.