The Looking Glass Self- the self emerges from our ability to assume the point of view of others and thereby imagine how they see us
... and then there was that time when Eloise snuck into the school after dark and...
We imagine how we appear and our behavior is received as we interact: the audience member is making a shocked facial expression in response to the speech
What the heck is he saying? This is not appropriate for a graduation speech
We then test this "theory" of how we are perceived by gauging others' reactions and revise our theory by fine-tuning our "self concept": the speaker sees the facial expression causing him to take the speech in a different direction
Oh my gosh, they hate me
Ummm, Meryl Streep once said, "This is your time and it feels normal to you but really there is no normal. There's only change, and resistance to it and then more change.