The Knights Tale

The Knights Tale
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  • Theseus encounters several weeping widows. He promises to kill Creon and avenge them. 
  • We're sad as f*** bro. Our baby daddies got killed.
  • That's how it is on these streets. We'll roll up on 'em. Slice slice!
  • After killing Creon and conquering Thebes, Theseus finds two knights named Palamon and Arcite. They are taken back to Athens to be used for ransom.
  • Now that Creon's ugly-self dead, we gotta take these two to da prison. Don't drop that soap fam
  • Palamon and Arcite set their eyes upon the beautiful Emily as she gathers flowers. They both fall for her, and begin to fight over her.
  • God dang! She thicker than a bowl a porridge!
  • Oh, you trying to square up, my dude?
  • As Arcite leaves prison (and Athens) and Palamon remains, both lament their situations concerning Emily. One can see her from afar, the other cannot see her at all. 
  • This is some messed up stuff, man!
  • Palamon and Arcite are caught fighting each other by Theseus. The king offers them an alternative to death.
  • Ya'll wanna fight for Emily?
  • Before the battle, Emily prays to marry a winner who loves her. Arcite prays only to win. Palamon prays for Emily's love.
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