Sammy Ratton: The Poorman's Tale Part 1

Sammy Ratton: The Poorman's Tale Part 1
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  • Three friends are drinking at a tavern after a laborious day of shoveling the latrines.
  • Europe 1382 A.D. "The Poorman's Tale"
  • I asked him where he got the coconuts! And he said that African swallows migrate here and European swallows migrate elsewhere. He asked me if they doesn't seem strange to me. So I asked the man if he was suggesting that coconuts migrate!
  • From out of nowhere last night, I heard what sounded like an army approach me. But it turned out to be a bloke riding an invisible horse with a squire banging coconuts together!
  • Then we will find Death and sack him like has our dear, departed friend!
  • I am sorry to inform you of your friend's untimely demise. He has been taken by Death. . .
  • Suddenly our animator suffered a stroke, saving us the money to skip the intermission. Don't worry, she's okay. We sent her flowers.
  • You there, old man! Have you seen Death?
  • No! Have you seen Death?
  • Nevermind.
  • Are you daft? Does it look like I can see the end? I'm blind you nutter!
  • Sheep shears? I ain't got one! Don't have a use for 'em.
  • Bringer of my behind?
  • GOLD! Shiny, gleaming gold!
  • Let's celebrate! Hurry go get some food and drink!
  • Remain 1000 ft away from this stash at all times. -The Devil Unless you're Joe Pesci
  • Why should I share all that gold with those blokes? I'll keep it all for myself! 
  • Bring out yer dead!
  • 60% off all Poisons!
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