Angel: Why don't you use an interest-based approach? Mark's behaviour is quite unusual, maybe an empathy-driven response would help him reveal the true reason for his outburst.Sam: Let's try it!
Sam: Hey Mark, I've noticed you haven't been yourself lately. You seem to be upset by something, and it's affecting your work and your relationship with coworkers. Is everything okay? Would you like to talk about it?Mark: Honestly, I'm glad you asked. I've been dealing with a lot of problems in my personal life lately, and I can't seem to balance work and home.Sam: I'm sorry to hear you've been struggling. I'm open to finding a way to lessen your stress at work. Maybe we could figure out a solution together. What do you think?
This approach seems to be going well, and Sam and Mark are communicating in a much more productive and respectful manner. Mark seems more open to developing a resolution– What should Sam do now?Angel: First, use the verbal channel of communication to directly ask him what's going on. Then, listen to his response, paying attention to non-verbal and preverbal cues to deepen your understanding of his feelings on the current situation. Finish by paraphrasing to indicate you understood his explanation and respond with an empathetic response to validate his feelings.
Sam: Why don't you tell me a little more about what's going on?Mark: Sure, thanks for asking. I'm experiencing financial struggles that are causing lots of stress in my personal lifeSam: You seem upset- if I understand correctly, you're saying that your recent behaviour has been influenced by the stress you're experiencing as a result of some financial difficulties?
Mark: Yes, I'm glad you understandSam: Of course, I'm sorry that you're experiencing such high stress. Hopefully we can work towards a resolution that can alleviate some of the stress you're under. I want you to know that you're highly valued at this company. We want to ensure that you're happy working here.
Sam: If you'd like, I can refer you to our company's financial advisor, who can provide you with some help managing your finances. We can also discuss your earnings at the end of the month, and whether you're eligible for a pay raise.