The Utterly Perfect Murder

The Utterly Perfect Murder
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  • I will arise now, after 36 years, and kill Ralph Underhill!
  • Happy 48th Birthday Doug!
  • I am going on a business trip
  • Sometimes I wish you would just fly!
  • Doug, where are you going?
  • Why would I fly when I could oil this gun and plot out the murder, and remember what Ralph did to me!?
  • I will trade you that baseball glove for this statue!  Even though it's the Great Depression.
  • 25¢
  • Sure!
  • $ 2
  • Haha!
  • Stop Ralph!
  • Ralph needed Doug to hit and Doug needed Ralph to be hit
  • Now since I am in Greenville, I will find Ralph Underhill, and kill him!
  • Doug, is that you? 
  • (Breathing heavily  and in shock)
  • Bang!  Bang!  Bang!  Bang!  Bang!  Bang!  
  • I knew that I would never actually use the gun!
  • Who is it?  Please tell me!
  • Doug!
  • Doug, Doug Spaulding, is that you?  Please tell me who you are?
  • Doug it is your future self!  Come outside with me, and leave this town!
  • Wait for me!
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