Growing up different was tiring and mentally stressful to grow up different. Nothing about myself appealed to me. I was short and slender, with a large nose and poofy hair. The most popular students in school were Axel and Avery. They never liked me and continually made fun of me. It was quite tough to get to school. I tried everything I could to fit in, but it seemed like nothing I did was adequate. I had no choice except to cry quietly in the bathroom.
The Talk pt 2
Walking back home made me feel even worse. I didn't want to go to school, it made me feel horrible about myself. I was invisible to everyone and if they felt like noticing me, it was to make fun of me. I wanted to be a different person. I wanted to be the beauty standard and not the unlikeable loser in the background. I hated being Egyptian and when someone asked the question, "Where are you from?" I would simply not respond. Everything was normal until my mom caught me...
Finding myself
I can do this!
Every day, my mother noticed how distressed I appeared and decided to intervene. When she'd pack me Egyptian cuisine, she'd note how my behavior altered. I'd say no and that I hated being Egyptian. I was so desperate for straight hair that I would continually urge my mother to straighten it for me. My hair would only look decent if it was straight, I reasoned. I'd be an outcast if I went to school with my natural hair. I didn't want to be bullied any farther than I already was.
Standing up for myself
My mother began to cry as she listened to me complain. No mother wants to hear her own daughter belittle herself and her culture. I couldn't stand it any longer because this was the lowest point of my life. My mother told me that my culture was wonderful and that I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I had to defend myself, and I couldn't allow them to get to my head. My mom forbade me from straightening my hair and advised me to let it grow out naturally. I could do anything if I could walk around school with my hair down. Nothing was going to stop me now; I was ready to make a complete 180-degree turn in my life.
I showered in the bathroom, but I didn't pick up the straightener this time. I picked up a curling cream that I had previously purchased. I looked for a video on how to style curly hair on YouTube. I went to the store earlier to get some hair supplies. I applied the curling cream gently to my hair. I wanted to wash everything off and just use the straightener, but disappointing my mother would be the worst thing that could happen to me. I didn't want to see my mother's dissatisfied expression any longer. Listening to my mother's words, I didn't let the bullies get to my head. I was prepared to embrace my true culture.
I taught myself that crying in front of Avery and Axel wouldn't assist anyone when I returned to school. I'd rather have my mother proud of me than have Axel and Avery continue to dislike me. I didn't care what people thought any longer, and if they had an issue with me, then be it. Bullies bully because they are insecure about themselves, I discovered. They enjoy directing their rage towards others. I let Axel and Avery tease me, but I pretended to be unconcerned. They should stop being racist, I urged them, because my culture is lovely. Their surprised expressions when I stood up for myself always get to me. This is the start of my new journey to success.
My culture defines who I am and if you have a problem, then so be it!
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