graphic memoir part one
Storyboard Text
- Me
- What if they hate me? What if I did something wrong? I feel like something's wrong. I totally did something...
- Ella Athena
- What if my friends are tired of me? What if I'm too much for Hayden? What if this never ends? What if I'm accidentally killing my family? What if I get sick and die? What if I get more depressed? What if my parents get sick and die? What if I'm not good enough for this? What if Hayden gets tired of me? What if I can't handle school? What if I can't get good grades? What if I don't learn anything and fall behind next year? I can't do it - I'm not good enough. No one likes me. Everyone's just pretending. My parents are tired of me. I'm bringing Hayden down. People are getting worried about me. There's something wrong with me. What am I going to do? What if this doesn't get better? What if the pandemic never ends? What if I'm dying? What if I can never see Hayden again? What if I can never see my friends again? What if my friends are tired of me? What if I'm too much for Hayden? What if this never ends? What if I'm accidentally killing my family? What if I get sick and die? What if I get more depressed? What if my parents get sick and die? What if I'm not good enough for this? What if Hayden gets tired of me? What if I can't handle school? I can't do it. I can't.
- Maybe...
- It's perfectly normal to be feeling overwhelmed during these times...you have anxiety. That's all.
- Tensions are rising as the pandemic worsens and health care workers go without supplies...
- I had known there was something slightly "off" for a while. Even in subdued situations with my friends, it felt as though the world was pressing in on me. Everything going on inside my head was too much, even when nothing was going on on the outside at all.
- The riots in Minneapolis continue after the police killing of George Floyd...Civil unrest grows nationwide as a spotlight is thrown onto police brutality.
- Then the pandemic hit. I was isolated; away from my boyfriend, Hayden, stuck without my friends, and trapped in my room. All of the previous issues became magnified in my solitude. I stewed in my thoughts for a few weeks before they became truly unbearable.
- oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god why am I crying everything is terrible oh my god I'm such a burden why am I like this oh my god why am I like this I shouldn't be crying ugh
- Wes...it's okay. You don't need to cry. Tomorrow will be better.
- I decided it was time to make a change. I began to attend virtual therapy with the psychologist that had helped me with a previous eating problem, Margaret. I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
- This sucks.I wish I could see my friends.
- *sniff*I'm okay. Nothing's wrong.
- oh my god this is so bad why do I feel like this what's wrong with me everything is going bad am I going insane this is so bad oh my god this is so bad why do I feel like this what's wrong with me everything is going bad am I going insane this is so bad oh my god this is so bad why do I feel like this what's wrong with me everything is going bad am I going insane this is so bad oh my god what's wrong with me everything hurts oh my god I'm dying -
- Despite my ongoing attempts to be healthier, which included therapy and exercise, I saw virtually no progress. In fact, things were worsening both on the inside and out. There was no end in sight with the pandemic, and my thoughts clouded every day of quarantine. At this point, I didn't see a way out.
- crap.
- Though a typical day was rough, it seemed like every few weeks things got so bad that I collapsed under the weight of my own mind. Hayden tried to help me through, sitting with me on facetime as I cried, but there was no real solution. I didn't know what was wrong with me, but it definitely was not just anxiety.
- In the later months of quarantine, I had grown used to the disquiet in my head. A constant noise, bearable most of the time, followed me everywhere. But every month, for a few days, it became deafening. It came to the point that I couldn't function as a human being because I had so many panic and anxiety attacks during that period.
- what if..? nope. nice view.
Over 30 Million Storyboards Created